16 Going on Life

….so, in 21 days my sweet boy, Joshua​, will be 16 years old.  To most of you it is just another birthday…ho hum…no big deal, they all grow up, right?  Well, to me it is a very big deal…

Joshua is my only boy and my only child.  He came into my life quite pleasantly and unexpectedly.  When I learned that I was expecting him, I cried with joy.  That joy has over-filled my cup for sixteen years.

He is my comfort…the love of my life…my laughter…my heart…

When I watch him, I find intelligence, depth, a desire to be holy, humor, bluntness, tender-heartedness, wittiness, literalness, zaniness, and sometimes a lack of common sense <smile>.

In 21 days, he will receive his driver’s license and a bit of my heart will go everywhere with him.  However, even that does not make my heart ache more than knowing that in four, very short years he will leave my nest and become his own man.

The thought is bitter-sweet, as I’ve spent the past 16 years preparing him for such a time as this.  Sweet because he has and is becoming everything I ever wanted for him.  Bitter because my job as his care-giver, nurse, decision-maker, confidant and teacher will come to an end.  I will begin to play a different role in his life…

My new role will be friend, sounding board, mother-in-love to his future wife, Mammaw to his children, and I will be his history.  Then, all to soon, the day will come that he will escort me to my grave, as I escorted him into his life…we will say farewell and see you when you arrive Home.  He will weep at my grave and I pray he will look back on our life together and know that….

Joshua’s Momma loved him more than her own life…

In 21 days, my Joshua will be 16….Happy Birthday, Joshua, and I love you…sweet boy!

Love,

Momma

Joshua and MommyJoshua Smiling 91214

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