It just doesn’t happen every day. No, some mornings barge in without yesterday completely being put to bed.
The sun peeked up over the horizon early this morning (really not any earlier than it does any other morning) and I was not ready for its perky light. It stretched up over the houses behind ours waking the morning dove and sandhill cranes. From a distance, I could hear the cars driving by carrying unreluctant folks into their Monday and work schedules.
My Minature Schnauzer, Maggie, was curled up tight against my body to stay warm. We’ve had our windows open during the night to enjoy the crisp cool air. I sat up, rubbed my eyes, and gave the sun a bemoaned look while Maggie grunted her displeasure along with me. I quietly prayed, “Lord, I’m not ready to face today — please teach me to be grateful for this day.”
My husband sauntered out of our closet — dressed for work. He greeted me with his perpetual smile and came over to kiss me. He cupped his hands around my head and gently pulled it to his chest…and at that moment my heart betrayed me as a tear slipped down my cheek. I think he sensed the betrayal and gently held me a bit tighter. I wanted to scream, “please don’t go…don’t leave me today.”
I quickly moved into the bathroom and brushed my hair and teeth then made my way upstairs to our den. I sat down and it just felt so difficult to breathe the air that God had so graciously provided for me that day. David came upstairs with a hot cup of coffee and I tightly wrapped my hands around the warmth of the cup and smiled at him. And, as he gently kissed me on the cheek and said, “Goodbye, ” I was alone.
We don’t always get up in the morning feeling grateful and alive and ready to take on the day that is so mercifully and graciously provided by our Heavenly Father. When the living is tough, the days run quite unmercifully together and grace seems foreign to a day that won’t end. However, God is not foreign to the day or what He has planned for us that given day.
You see, ours isn’t mere survival — although it often feels like it. Our lives, intertwined with others, is a gift. It is given in love and graciousness. Resting in the understanding that I am tired and He is good — well, it can be work. I always know He is good — “all the time,” but my energy and light abandon me and so I have to know (not feel) that He can be trusted regardless.
As I continue to hold the warm mug of love that my husband prepared me, God whispers to my heart that His mercies are new each morning. Thank you, Father.
But there’s one other thing I remember, and remembering, I keep a grip on hope: GOD’s loyal love couldn’t have run out, his merciful love couldn’t have dried up. They’re created new every morning. How great your faithfulness! I’m sticking with GOD (I say it over and over). He’s all I’ve got left. GOD proves to be good to the man who passionately waits, to the woman who diligently seeks. It’s a good thing to quietly hope, quietly hope for help from GOD. Lamentations 3:21-26 (The Message)